Fearless Confessions: A Writer's Guide to Memoir, Sue William Silverman, The University of Georgia Press, Athens, GA, 2009, pps. 237.
Faithful readers of my monthly EWAs will recall that in May of this year I reviewed a book called The Secret Life of Pronouns by James W. Pennebaker, that recounted results of numerous studies he and others conducted all proving that disclosing emotionally powerful secrets is good for one's health. Doing so can literally boost immune function, drop blood pressure and reduce depression while elevating one's mood. (Note: There is no need to show your writing to anyone to gain these health improvements. Simply the act of writing, the act of telling your secrets to the paper you write them on makes the improvements. Is that not amazing? Or is it that I am easily amazed?)
This is the guide for everyone wishing to take full ownership of their lives by writing about traumatic episodes.
In Fearless Confessions: A Writer's Guide to Memoir, Sue William Silverman gives readers a six-step guide to writing memoirs and crafting them into art:
- ''Savory Words'' discusses how to lift your prose out of the prosaic. Instead of writing that ''the sun rises on [a] homeless, hung-over man,'' write, ''Sunrays clanged in his ear.'' She discusses how external sensory imagery can be crafted to create mood and emotion. She writes, ''Don't just state your story, reveal your story.'' And she suggests, we ''move readers with active words.''
- ''Writing on Key'' suggests how to unify a memoir with a single theme without oversimplifying. Novice writers often jump from theme to theme without focusing on a single one. Silverman gives suggestions for spotting this weakness and overcoming it.
- ''Plotting your Life'' covers the ins and outs of effective plotting. I found her description of horizontal plots and vertical plots very valuable, something I had never seen explained before. She talks about how a writer of memoir can discover important meanings in life-events decades after they occur. I have experienced the life-changing power of these discoveries as I have made them and they have empowered me on my life journey.
- ''Between Innocence and Experience” discusses the process of a writer finding his or her voice. I have certainly found over the years how my writing voice has improved as I migrated from first-person (which I always interpreted as being limited to the knowledge and vocabulary of the character) to close-third-person (where as a third-person narrator I feel far more freedom to be an effective advocate for my character and to be far better informed about what is going on in the story than the character may be.)
- ''Mock Moons and Metaphor'' is about the process of crafting memoir story into art.
- ''Writing in Style''discusses writing styles and how one goes about choosing a style of writing to match the story one is telling.
Added value makes it an excellent textbook.
Silverman supplements this core content with elements which make this book an excellent choice to use as a text in a literary non-fiction creative writing course:
- Writing Exercises which give writers a jumping-off point to get started applying the content Silverman covers. Trust me: These exercises are not pushovers. One example: ''Write a short paragraph about the thing you were most afraid to tell your mother growing up, or the thing you’re still most afraid to tell her now.''
- Short snippets called,''For your Reading Pleasure'' at the close of each chapter serve to illustrate the points Williams made within that chapter. They are also very entertaining.
- An overview describing all the various subgenres of creative nonfiction. I was unaware all those subgenres even existed.
- Four full-length essays at the end of the book giving the reader excellent models for how to craft superior memoir writing.
- A reading list of contemporary literary non-fiction is categorized by kind; this listing is very valuable for someone who wishes to become better read in this exciting literary art form.
As one might expect with a title like Fearless Confessions, the memoir material of her own that Silverman covers does not make for light, casual reading. On behalf of all those who have overcome childhood trauma, whether by writing about it or by other means, Silverman’s work struck me as important, not only for the author to write but for readers to read.
One caveat: Some have criticized her book for not telling enough stories of her own struggles as she wrote about her own trauma. If Silverman were to issue a revised edition of Fearless Confessions she would do well to remove any doubt from the reader’s mind about her willingness to tell her own story by moving chapter nine, entitled ''Confessional and (Finally) Proud of It,'' and calling it chapter two in her revised edition. (Chapter One tells the story of how she came to write her first memoir. That should remain chapter one.)
Why should chapter nine become chapter two? Because chapter nine reveals the author’s feelings about why she wrote this book, and other memoirs that she has published (some of them award-winning); also, the connections she has to her confessions and why they are both empowering and, redemptive. Perhaps humanizing might be the better word to use here, because when Silverman tells her trauma stories, she does seem to be reclaiming part of her human-hood, which the trauma blocked off access to until she was able to overcome it.
At first, everyone is hesitant to write about their traumas.
I believe most of us, at least at first, are hesitant to confess some of the traumas Sue Silverman details early on in her book and then again in chapter nine: She grew up with a father who sexually molested her; the homes she lived in were ''prisons'' to her. As an adult she spent many years in therapy to come to terms with her sexual addiction.
The author addresses the ethical issues.
At the heart of what causes many people to never write about their traumas are the ethical questions that inevitably come up. (Some would say, loyalty-to-the-predator questions.) Without doubt, trauma stories come with strings attached.
What about the relatives, often parents, who are inevitably the abusers, the predators? They are the monsters who hurt and cause the trauma. What about them? Totally uninterested bystanders might say, ''Aren’t the tellers of the stories accusing their parents or other close relatives of committing terrible sins? Don’t the relatives get a say in the matter?'' And what if relatives simply don’t wish to participate in this form of public confessional? What if they would rather be left out of it? Do they not have a right to say, ''Do not write about me or it. Write me out of it.''
Sue William Silverman addresses this issue; I think she builds a powerful case. Ultimately, when you are imprisoned by childhood traumas, one way to liberate yourself is by literally writing your way out of it. There are other ways, of course, but if you choose to write, you can hardly choose to avoid incriminating others. My opinion: Incest-predators like Silverman’s father should have thought of that when they perpetrated their crimes. (It is also important to point out: After you write a memoir, no one said you must publish it or make it public.) As Silverman expresses it:
''But what about other people involved in my secrets, especially my parents? Aren’t I, in my writing, supposed to protect their privacy?
''No.
''Since my family was involved in the creation of who I am, I feel justified, even obligated as a writer to reveal the roles they played. It was because my father molested me that I suffered from sex addiction, an eating disorder.
''How can I write a life, be a memoirist, without including members of my family? They are woven into the threads of every experience. If I don’t write, I will once again be silenced, just like the child-me; in essence, my father will silence me. If I don’t write my secrets I will, in effect, still be keeping his. Only my own words can finally fill that blank, empty space that once was me.
''Only by telling our family truths could we have been an authentic family. Only by telling my secrets can I be an authentic woman. This is the only way for me to be an authentic writer, as well.
''Writing is a way to remove the muzzle and blinders from childhood. Writing is a way to take possession of, to fully own, my life. Only I own my memories that dwell in the attic of my mind. As sole possessor of them, I am free to write.
''By doing so, I feel my own power. Through telling my story, listening to the stories of others, I am no longer a timid little girl, even as I still, at times, get scared. But I try not to allow fear to preclude me from writing. After years of silence, I have a voice.
''Write anyway! Whatever the roadblock. Write anyway!''
And what if you are one of those who say, I do not want to write about my traumatic childhood experiences. I would rather write about how happy my childhood was? Something tells me Fearless Confessions isn’t for you.
Ah, but if you are of the ilk who has wished you could put traumatic experiences down on paper, then pick up Fearless Confessions. Your health might improve as a result.
